Tuesday, March 31, 2009

"No, Officer...."

Lazy Moms (you can click on them on my Blogs I Follow list) are asking for our embarrassing, crazy stories this morning and seeing as how I have more than one !!!! I thought I'd try this "link-up" thing and spill ......Here goes -----

Our family had recently moved to the big city of Fort Worth, Texas for my husband to go to grad school. We were from a little town of less than 75 people and at the time, 3 million people lived in the metroplex, so "culture shock" was at every turn. My husband went to school all day, then to work until midnight. So, I was home alone with three small children much of the time.

Being struggling students, we were living in a seedier part of town and I was always suspicious, always a bit "jumpy". Sirens were common. Gunfire, though less common, was occasionally heard. For this little girl from the laid-back country, was bug-eyed and amazed most of the time. And always "on the look-out".

Sooooo, when the kids and I got home from church that Wednesday night to find our front screen door locked, my heart dropped to my stomach, and I knew there was a burglar (or worse) in our house. I herded the kids back into our little Honda wagon and we sped away to the nearest 7-11 to find a pay phone(before the days when we all had cell phones) and I called my husband. Not the police, mind you. I called my husband who was 15 miles away at work and totally unable to help -- however, he did call the police for me. Good thing, since I was trembling so much I couldn't make complete sentences at this point.

We waited, spy-like, around the corner and out of sight until the police arrived at the house. The two officers went up the steps to the house talking and probably not really very much believing of my "story" UNTIL they tried to open the door and yes, it was locked, obviously from the inside. One officer immediately and silently took off for the back door area, the other officer opened the door with some device and after instructing me to "stand back against the wall" they entered the house, with guns drawn.

Several long, long minutes later, the two officers emerged from the front door and with grim faces told me "yes, ma'am it looks like you've had a break-in! The place has been totally ransacked!!!"

Well, I was completely distraught but trying to keep it together for the kids' sakes. Then the officer said "Ma'am, we need you to walk through the house with us and tell us what is missing." He gets out his pen and paper and readies himself for the list making.

My mind is racing as I'm walking slowly with the officers. Oh my gravy!! My parents are not gonna believe this!!! This is just crazy! This is just what everyone says about living in the big city! I can not believe this is happening to us!!!

Then as we proceed room by room, through the house I start thinking, "Oh my gosh!!! What on earth do we have that a burglar would want anyway????? We're just poor, struggling seminary students!! We have nothing! Well, we DO have a TV" And now I'm getting a little riled up over it. "If they stole our TV!!! So help me!!!!" But, no! There's the TV right where we left it.

As I'm stepping over all manner of clothes and shoes, piles of toys, and food wrappers and what could easily be misconstrued as the ransacked contents of drawers and closets, I slowly am coming to a humiliating conclusion. Now, I start to stall for time.

"Ma'am?" the officer still has his pen and paper ready and is waiting ........
"Ma'am? Is anything missing?" he asks expectantly.

And finally I get out the words. The most humiliating, embarrassing words I've ever had to utter...... "No, officer. This is pretty much how we left it."

Arrrrgggggh!! Now that was 20 plus years ago. And I implore you, I beg you, I beseech you --- PLEASE look at the rest of my blog. You will see that I've grown a lot !!! since those days !!!! And you know what?? As embarrassing as this event was, I mean totally traumatic, it has served a real purpose in encouraging other women. I've told this story so many times to young wives who are struggling with their home and their children. And it's been an encouragement to them. Because they can look at where I am today-- the fact that my home is orderly and clean most of the time-- and have hope that as messy as life may be right now today......it's gonna get better!!! Just hang in there!


  1. Hi Gywn! Lazy Mom Leslie here. Love to find a fellow Texan out here in blog land! I have family in West Texas so I have probably been to your town wherever it is. I want to read your crazy story (which I am sure is a Lazy confession!). Where is it?

  2. This is my favorite story that you tell. I absolutely fall down laughing every time I hear it. The first time I heard it, I totally fell in love with you and your beautiful family. This is what makes Gwynie....well, Gwynie. I love you and thank you for sharing this with the world...(but most of all with me).

  3. Oh my gosh Gwyn! I'm cracking up! I love this story. Thank you so much for sharing it with other moms. It is very encouraging. I remember the days of small children and how hard it was to keep up with everything. We all need that encouragement! Thanks for linking to Lazy Moms!

  4. I was so glad you shared this with me several years ago. It made me laugh then and it still makes me laugh today. It also gives me hope. Love you for sharing this. If we would all be more real and share like this many of us wouldn't be so hard on ourselves.

  5. OMG...I had a very similar experience. I came home to a wide open front door (that hubby didn't close hard and forgot to lock), I called the police and they came and told me the same thiing! So embarrassing!!!! That's why we make beds every day now!

  6. I absolutely love that story... have told it to lots of friends... makes me feel better.... love you and your blog!!

  7. Ok, I am crying! Tears of laughter (I've heard you tell this several times and it's still so funny!) and tears of appreciation. I ditto everything that Christi said... your honesty and humility is what makes us younger moms/homemakers keep coming back and asking for your counsel and wisdom. I love you, love you, love you! By the way - I think we all love this story because we can SO relate! :)

  8. Love your comment you just left on our site. That's great! That would be kind of nice to have the pressure taken off the yard, but then there's that pressure for the cotton! We all have our own stresses! :)